Show Me How to Lie
by elmoisemo6
Summary: Kurloz/OC/Kankri; Valora is somehow teleported to a whole new universe and she has no idea what's going on.
1. Prologue

I strangely felt like I was weightless, as if nothing around me existed anymore. And then that feeling came to crashing halt. My limbs felt like deadweight and my head weighed a million human pounds. My god tier wings that were hidden underneath my shirt as usual, felt crumpled. I flexed them and fluttered them as much as I could in their confinement. I pressed them against my body to hide them from anyone that might be nearby. I didn't want to attract attention. A groan escaped my lips and I had to pry my eyes open. My lids seemed to be glued together, but I fought through it.

Light blinded me instantly. I squeezed my eyes shut right away. I had never seen the light of day before, since the sun was much too bright. I had heard of a troll going blind from looking at the sun. It seemed I was in danger of this now. I didn't think I could adapt to smelling and tasting colors though.

Keeping my eyes shut, I gathered my feet under me and forced myself to stand. I immediately felt the works of vertigo. My knees wobbled, threatening to make me drop. I reached my hand out cautiously, afraid to what I might find in my blind state. My fingertips came into contact with something rough. I let my hand flit up and down its surface. It felt like the bark of a tree. Was I in a forest? I listened closely to my surroundings. I could hear songs from tweetbeasts. It had been a long time since I heard one of them. I had never really bothered to notice them when I was alive, but now their songs were utterly beautiful.

I heard the snap of a twig from not too far away from myself. I sharply turned in that direction, not that I could see a thing. I hoped it was a hopbeast, but it sounded much larger. Maybe an antler creature then? I started to shake uncontrollably. This was terrifying. I had no idea where I was, or how I got here, I couldn't see a thing since I didn't dare open my eyes, and now I was alone with something, or _someone_.

I tried to calm my breaths. My sylladex was set to staffkind, so I wasn't completely defenseless, but I was a terrible fighter. "Hello?" I called out cautiously. "Is anyone there? I-I'm a highblood, you know."

"Are you hostile?" a voice I believed to be male asked. He seemed to be only human yards away.

"I-uh, should I be?"

"What are you?" he asked, ignoring my question.

"What? Listen, like I said before, I'm a highblood. I'm also lost and confused right now. And I know all the trolls native to the dream bubble and you aren't one of them. I'll tell you who I am if you do the same."

He didn't reply.

"I'm Valora Lobade, Sylph of Shade."

"...I'm called Hawkeye and I work for SHEILD."

"I have no idea what that means, Hawkeye."

I could hear his footsteps get closer and I quickly backed up into a tree. "It means I have to take you in. All unknown alien life forms are considered a threat until proven otherwise."

"Alien? And I thought it was 'innocent until proven guility,' or that's one thing I've heard." I felt cold metal wrap around my wrists. "What are you doing? Let go of me!" Suddenly the feeling of something needle-like pricking my skin was on the side of my neck. Exhaustion swept through me and my knees wobbled, worse than before.

Once again, I was weightless.


	2. Chapter 1

The sluggish feeling of your body weighing much more than it actually did was becoming too familiar. I tried opening my eyes and I instantly regretted it. I just couldn't learn, could I?

"You finally awake?" a female voice asked.

I groaned in response. My head laid on top of cold, metal slab, possibly a table, and I was seated in what felt like an uncomfortable chair. "Where am I?" I moaned.

"You're in SHIELD interrogation, that's all you need to know."

"O-Okay." I swallowed harshly. I had never been interrogated before. Her voice was emotionless.

"Open your eyes," she commanded.

I shook my head. "I can't, it hurts. The lights are too bright." I could only see bright blue on the inside of my eyelids, which suddenly faded to a dark blue.

"That better?"

I slowly peeked my eyes open. The lighting was dimmer and much more comfortable. I blinked rapidly to adjust. The room was small and gray. My eyes found the woman in front of me and much to my surprise, she was a human, an adult human. She had pink skin just like Rose and Dave, but her hair wasn't straw yellow, instead it was a rusty orange, ending above her shoulders and becoming curly as it grew out. Her eyes fell somewhere between blue and gray. Was she a highblood as well? Wait, did humans even have highbloods? She was certainly beautiful, she could be almost considered competition for Porrim.

She looked confused. "Your eyes are white..."

"Oh yes, that's because I'm dead."

Now she looked bewildered. She quickly composed her expression. "Is that so?"

"Yes."

She sat down across from me, the metal table the only thing between us. She pulled out a pale yellow folder and opened it. It only had a single sheet. "We practically know nothing about you, with the exception of the first encounter. Would you like to fill us in?"

"I-I guess?"

"You said your name was Valora Lobade."

It wasn't a question, but I answered anyways. "Yes."

"What do you mean by 'Sylph of Shade'?"

"It's my god tier title."

"What are you and where are you from?" She shot out questions without a pause.

"I-uh, I'm a troll. I'm from Beforus."

"That's the name of your planet?"

I nodded. "It was."

"Past tense? What happened?"

"Uh, I don't really like to talk about it."

Her eyes narrowed. "Does it have something to do with you being dead?"

I looked away from her tense gaze. I couldn't match it, it was prying for answers, trying to dig up memories that were lost in bubbles. And I didn't want them back.

My line of sight fell upon the mirror behind her. My pure white eyes stared back. Though the memories are faded, I remembered when I had light blue eyes, matching my blood color just like all the trolls' eyes did. I could have stored those memories away in bubbles, but I couldn't part with them, even at the risk of them disappearing forever. My black hair was disheveled. My miniature hoofbeast tail (I believe humans call them pony tails...) was barely held in place. My horns were still visible in the mess of strands. They were small and had two sharp points on each one. One of my cheeks was light blue from being pressed against the table while I was unconscious. My black lips were chapped, dark gray bags were under my eyes. My fangs slightly protruded from my lips and looked as if they needed to be brushed, which explained the foul taste in my mouth. Who said the dead didn't need to worry about a thing?

I was lost somewhere that was definitely not inside of a dream bubble, with humans I didn't know, and right then I wanted to curled up with my matesprit and just block everything out. I closed my eyes and tried to stop the tears from coming. My throat was tight and I rubbed my eyes. "Please," I squeaked, "I have no idea what's going on. I'm tired and I just wanna go home." A sob slipped passed my lips. I pressed the heels of my hands into my eyes. I tried to control the shuddering breaths, but it was useless. I heard her chair scrape across the floor, then the door open and shut.

I lowered my hands and looked through the light blue tears. I was alone. I sniffled and wiped my hand across my nose.

After what seemed like fifteen minutes later, she came back in the room. She approached me and unlocked the chains from the table, but they still bound my wrists. "What's going on?" I asked in a hushed voice.

She said nothing and led me out of the room.

The hallways were also dim, as if the lights had been lowered just for me. We eventually came to a door that opened to a very large room. There were humans everywhere. They all looked so different too. They were hornless as ever with their round ears, varying hair and eye colors. All the humans I had seen had some sort of pink skin, but there were different shades. Some had pink, tan, or even dark brown. They buzzed about, many sitting in front of screens. They all wore similar black, tight suits, like the one the female human that led me here wore. They threw curious glances at me, but didn't linger to watch. The farthest wall in the room was huge, and made almost completely of glass. The window was open to the night sky.

It was overwhelming, to say in the least.

She led me to a round table where multiple humans sat. She motioned me to sit with them. I lowered myself into the seat and kept my eyes low. I was in unfamiliar territory, possibly in the enemy's nest.

"Valora Lobade, I am Director Nick Fury."

My head snapped up at the sound of my name. I met the eye of a human male across the table. He was the only one that wasn't sitting. I couldn't tell if he was genuinely tall, or it was just an illusion. He had his hands folded behind his back. His skin was dark, as was his eye. The other was covered by a black eye patch, from which scars radiated. A black trench coat shrouded his frame as he stood to his full height. He was certainly intimidating.

"When you arrived to our planet, there was a signal of energy. Luckily, Hawkeye was close by." He gestured a human sitting to his right with short light brown hair and a quiver full of arrows strapped to his back. This was Hawkeye? "We just received word of another energy signal exactly like yours and we're heading toward it now. If you're sending multiple beings of your species to our planet, I need to know."

"I uh, I don't even know what planet this is."

"You're on Midgard, also known as Earth," a deep voice answered. The male that spoke had yellow hair that reached just passed his shoulders. He had blue eyes and a beard. He wore silver armor and a rich red cape. "I am Thor."

"Earth?!" This didn't make any sense!

"Yes, is that surprising?" a male with graying black hair asked. He had strange facial hair and brown eyes.

"I-I thought Earth had been destroyed."

"Why would you think that?" Director asked. Was that really his name? It was probably a title.

"Well uh, I was told by two humans that it was."

"So you know of Midgardians?" Thor asked. He seemed intrigued.

"Yes. I've only met two though."

"Who?" the Director pressed.

"Uh, R-Rose and Dave. I met them in the dream bubble?"

"Dream bubble?" the black haired human asked. "Are you from Narnia or something?"

I was about to inform him that I had never heard of Narnia when a female human walked up. Her brown hair was pulled back into a tight bun. "We've arrived, sir."

"Good," Director responded. "Avengers," he addressed the people around the table, "go, and bring her." He pointed straight me.

"Are you sure that's wise, sir?" another human asked. They just didn't seem to end. He had yellow hair that was short and neatly kept. He had blue eyes that showed respect toward Director. His outfit was rather ridiculous. It was skin tight, dominantly blue, had some red, and white stars.

"She's the only one around here that knows what's going on."

That wasn't true. I was just as confused, more so really, as anyone else in the room.

They all stood up from the table. The female quickly reached my side and grasped my arm and pulled me along. We were moving again. We briefly went outside and I thanked Gog that it was nighttime. I had lost sight of the black haired male, but he met up with us outside. This time he was in a red and gold suit of armor. The only way I could identify him was that his face was uncovered. We boarded a human jet. My chains were locked to the benches that were against the walls on the inside. The female and Hawkeye left my sight to the front of the machine. The jet started ascending into the air. It was unsettling. I had flown before, but never in a machine. And my wings could not go this fast.

The strangely clothed male sat next to me and introduced himself. "I'm Steve Rogers, ma'am."

I shifted in my seat. I had never been called ma'am before. "Uh, hi." I lightly grasped his hand that he held out to me. He shook my hand briefly and retracted his limb. Human customs were weird.

"Don't get too cozy, Capsicle," the black haired one said in a teasing manner, "she could be some evil monster in an innocent alien-girl's body."

Steve's mouth pressed into a hard line. "Tony, that's ridiculous."

The Tony Human shrugged as much as his suit would allow. "You never know with aliens. No offense, Point Break," he said, addressing Thor.

Point Break was too busy staring at me to acknowledge Tony. "I am unfamiliar with your species. You said you are from Beforus? I have never heard of such a place."

"Uh, yeah. I'm from Beforus."

"You're also a troll," Steve cut in. "You certainly aren't the ones described in children's stories."

"Children...?" What was that again? "Oh, right." Children were like human wrigglers.

"Your species don't have children or something?" Tony raised an eyebrow.

"Well, not exactly. We have wrigglers, which is basically what we call our children," I explained.

Steve frowned. "Wrigglers?"

"But your planet," Thor jumped back in, "where is it? I am familiar with the Nine Realms, but not Beforus."

"Probably because it was renamed Alternia," I said lowly.

"Alternia...?" A look passed over his face. He turned away, a frown crossing his features.

"Are you alright, Thor?" Steve questioned.

"I need a moment to think."

We sat in silence until the female from upfront called back to us, "We're here." The jet descended and I had to wait for the female to unlock the chains from the bench and lead me out. Tony had his face covered with the helmet and Steve had donned his mask. Thor clutched a mighty hammer in his hand. We were in a meadow with tall buildings in the distance.

"So, what are we looking for here?" Tony asked, his voice a bit manipulated by the suit.

"Any abnormal activity. This is the coordinates that Dr. Banner sent us," the female answered.

"Abnormal?" Tony scoffed. "We are abnormal. We have two secret agents, Capsicle, an alien-god, and now some alien-demon-troll-thing, plus we're looking for another of her species."

"You shouldn't call people names, you could trigger them. Please, tag your triggers," a familiar voice lectured. (#TW, #name calling)

Our heads snapped in the direction of the voice. I instantly recognized the other troll by his nubby horns, short stature, and most of all, his bright red turtleneck sweater.

"KANKRI!"


End file.
